I wish I had kept a list of many of the people I’ve Ubered in the past eight years. Some of you are truly creative. I’ve picked up “Bambi,” “King Kong,” “Chivalry,” “Eight-ball,” “X,” and “Mxysptlk” (a throwback to old Superman comics). There are too many to remember.
Often, the names are real. I’ve often wondered what was going on in the lives of parents when they named the newborn. The combinations of consonants and vowels testify to the pursuit of the unique. And, yes, I’ve picked up several riders with “Unique” as their moniker.
I’ve seen riders from all over our planet. Some nations include names with no vowels, while others include names with no consonants. I’m amazed at the flexibility Uber gives to riders from across Eurasia. I’ve gotten many ‘dings’ that display the pickup name in the Cyrillic alphabet. Very accommodating, don’t you think?
Uber sent me riders with names like “Thriller,” “Chiller,” and “Killer.”
Perhaps some of my favorites stem from a list of the seven deadly sins and the seven heavenly virtues. I’ve picked up “Pride,” “Humility,” “Charity (many times),” “Chastity,” “Envy,” and more. “Patience” is another one. I’ll cover that one in a minute.
I’ve given rides to some of this world’s most famous monikers. Shakespeare, Plato, Aesop, Oz, and Dr. Seuss have shared a ride with me.
I love the moment when a name pops up, and I can’t even guess at the pronunciation. I usually attempt to say the name when my passenger enters the car. “Am I close?” I asked. Sometimes, I haven’t come close, even after their corrections.
Today, though, I’d like to talk about “Patience.” You see, I’ve picked up Patience several times lately. The funny thing is that Patience has a different face each time. I think I’ve picked up some clues on the last ride with Patience.
I got a ding to pick up Patience at a hotel on Hwy 98 near Ft. Walton Beach.
“Patience?” I said. “I seem to be picking up a lot of folks with that name lately.”
In a deep, Spanish accent, HE said, “Oh, that’s my girl. I’m trying to find a place I’m trying to rent. Then, I’ll tell her where to go to meet me. I don’t want to pay for the place until I see it.”
We drove to a large condo facility on the beach. He seemed confused.
“I guess it has an office in there because the picture online shows a cottage. This is the address on the site, so I guess this is where I’m supposed to be. Well, thanks for the ride.”
I drove from the beach road back to Hwy 98. Uber dings me. It’s Patience again. I just dropped him off, so I know he’s not at the designated pickup spot, which is his original hotel. I called his number.
“Hi, I think you’ve put in the wrong pickup spot. Can you change it on your app? I can head toward you while you do that.”
“I’m right where you dropped me off. There’s no office here,” he said.
He never figured out how to change it, but the app lets me adjust the pickup spot.
“I’ve got the address now.” I think it’s further down the beach.
We arrived at the beachside address to find a partially built house and a gentleman cleaning up around the contractor’s Porto-let. He informed my rider that he owns the property and hasn’t rented it to anyone.
“You’ve been scammed!” he said.
“Can you take me back to the last place?” said my rider. “I finally found the phone number of the rental company, and the office is on the second floor of the building you originally dropped me.”
In the meantime, I’d accepted another ride. Fortunately, their pickup spot was on the way to Patience’s destination. I called them, and they graciously agreed to wait a few minutes for me to return. I rolled down my window, waved at them, and continued to the dropoff.
“Patience” thanked me, apologized, and headed inside the building. He would still need to get a ride to the cottage. He refused to set up his ‘rendevous’ with the original Patience until he saw the actual beach house. Somewhere along our ride, I got the feeling he had not laid eyes on Patience either.
Luckily, I had picked up a lovely family headed toward Destin. I don’t think I would have Patience again that day. I will say that Patience pays off – nice tip!
One last piece of advice – if you put your name down as “Big Tipper,” the chances of that being true have proven to be false more times than true. We’re on to you!
Thanks, and God Bless,
Tommy
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(I hope you will stay in touch. I’ll be releasing my book on July 15th. You can pre-purchase the Kindle version now! You’ll receive it on July 15th.
Here’s the link: Kindle version
The paperback is available on July 15th, but it’s not available for pre-purchase. I’ll let you know as soon as I have more information. I appreciate your support!)